The Journal

Issue date: 11/1/07 Section: Opinion/Editorial

St. Louis and its perceived inadequacies are a popular target for boring and small-minded people to bitch about. What those dreadfully dull people do not understand is that there is plenty to do in St. Louis, provided you get off your ass and do it. Certainly, other cities are bigger, have better weather and more extensive public transportation, but that doesn't mean St. Louis can't compete and doesn't have its own attractions to offer to the public.

St. Louis is a city meant for drinking (and driving apparently, because our public transportation sucks). A recent Forbes study ranked St. Louis as one of the top drunkest cities in America. Of the 35 cities Forbes studied, St. Louis ranked sixth in the number of heavy drinkers. Overall, St. Louis was deemed the 11th drunkest city.

Cities that many people flock to in order to binge on large quantities of alcohol don't come close to St. Louis' ranking. Las Vegas came in at number 14, San Francisco at 20, Los Angeles at 23, New Orleans at 24, New York at 32 and Miami at 33. Next time you're sitting, drinking on the beach in Miami, partying in what's left of New Orleans or running from gang violence in Los Angeles with a forty ounce can, remember that you could be with other drunks in St. Louis, having a good time.

With the possible exception Milwaukee, which everyone can agree is an awful, cold place full of rank beer, no other city in America can boast a stronger brewing tradition than St. Louis. We are home of multiple brewers, including the world's largest - Anheuser Busch.

While Budweiser may not beat Guinness or many other beers in a taste, it's still better than that dirty looking Lake Michigan piss water they try to pass off as beer in Milwaukee.

If you're up for it, the free Anheuser Busch tours begin at 9 a.m., free beer included. Also, Grant's farm, an attraction filled with various animals and targeted for children, has something for adults as well. It offers free Anheuser Busch beer for visitors to taste test. There's something there for the whole family.

The soaking remnants of a town down South still righteously boasts the largest Mardi Gras celebration in America. That is fine, since New Orleans is a vast, partially underwater wasteland with little else to be proud of. With its warm weather and storied past, it's no wonder people flock there to get wasted and forget their destitute present. Still, people from around the country come to St. Louis for the second largest Mardi Gras, right in the middle of our harsh, inland winter. While drunks puke all over the newly washed French Quarter in average temperatures of 54 degrees, St. Louis' Mardi Gras party goers celebration on in six inches of snow and average temperatures of 35 degrees.

Continued...

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